When a woman is abused or mistreated within an intimate relationship, it is clearly her fault. She probably did something to deserve her treatment.
Right answer(s): False
No one deserves to be hit, threatened, or treated in a violent or aggressive manner, especially within the context of a dating or intimate relationship. Regardless of a partner's behavior, the other partner does not have the right to act in a violent or aggressive manner towards that person. If a student is unhappy or angry about an issue within their relationship, there are alternatives to violence and aggression which can help resolve the problem.
When women hit men (or abuse them in some other way), the same consequences should apply as when men hit women.
Right answer(s): This matter is up for debate
This is a highly controversial issue. Generally, the law indicates that in cases of domestic assault, men are assumed to be the perpetrators and frequently face consequences for engaging in aggressive or violent acts towards their partners. Research in this area shows, however, that women are just as likely as men, if not slightly more inclined, to initiate and perpetuate relationship aggression and violence within intimate relationships.
While women may be just as prone to engaging in relationship aggression as men, the reality remains that women are far more likely to be severely injured or killed in acts of relationship aggression. Given that men are often physically larger and stronger than women, acts of violence and aggression by men towards women cause greater physical harm, than women's acts on men.
Violence and aggression are problems that only straight couples have to worry about. Gay and lesbian couples don't have this problem.
Sexuality does not have any bearing on the likelihood of relationship aggression being a part of a couple's relationship. Just as straight couples may experience relationship aggression, so do same-sex couples. In fact, there is evidence that gay men may experience higher than average rates of relationship aggression within their intimate relationships. Homophobia, as well as stereotypes that only women are abused within intimate relationships, often prevent gay men who are being abused from seeking or receiving help for relationship aggression. Violence and aggression in intimate relationships is a problem that impacts both straight and same-sex couples.
When you compare the impact of physical aggression and violence with emotional abuse, the physical aggression is far worse and hurts people more.
Right answer(s): Both are hurtful
Generally, when a student is being victimized physically within a dating relationship, they are also being victimized emotionally. Research on relationship aggression shows that physical and emotional abuses often are paired. Therefore, it is important to remember that the damaging effects of these two forms of aggression cannot be teased apart. Rather, the impact of each is compounded by the presence of the other. Both physical and emotional aggression cause harm.
When children grow up in a household where they see relationship aggression, they learn that this is normal. In their own dating relationships, people often re-create this aggression/abuse dynamic.
Right answer(s): True
There is considerable evidence that certain variables predispose people to subsequent relationship aggression and abuse. These variables include low socioeconomic status, poor academic performance, and conduct problems in adolescence. Given that Job Corps students sometimes possess two, or even three, of these variables, Job Corps students are at increased risk for relationship aggression.
Furthermore, for students who grew up in households in which they experienced family violence, research shows that this also increases a student's chances of being involved in psychologically and physically abusive relationships. When students grow up being abused within their family, they are more likely to be victimized in their adult intimate relationships. This is especially true for women.
Violence can be "contagious." When a young person sees their peers condone relationship aggression and violence, others will try it in their own relationships.
Right answer(s): Sometimes
There is considerable support for the idea that people learn to engage in relationship aggression by witnessing relationship aggression in the couples around them. Young people learn to be aggressive through their families and their peers. In general, if the peer culture of Job Corps accepts relationship aggression as normal, it is more likely that students will tolerate this type of behavior and potentially perpetuate violence and aggression in their relationships.
You can tell how seriously a woman dislikes aggression and violence in her relationship by whether or not she stays. If a woman stays in the relationship, despite aggression and violence, then she clearly doesn't really mind the violence.
Just because a woman, or man, remains in a relationship despite the presence of aggression or violence, does not mean that they are condoning the situation. Rather, many students they may not feel that they have a choice in being abused or in ending the relationship. Leaving a relationship in which a student is victimized may ultimately mean that they have to choose between remaining in the relationship and staying at Job Corps, or ending the relationship and leaving Job Corps. Often, when students who are being treated in an aggressive or violent manner attempt to leave the situation, the violence intensifies.
Students who try to leave a bad relationship may find that their former partner begins to stalk, make treats against, or harass them. Students may feel too afraid of their partner to try to leave. Those who do leave their relationship may fear for their safety. It is not uncommon for students who are involved in aggressive relationships to become socially isolated. Often partners, in an attempt to control the other partner, will force the end of friendships, family connections, and other social relationships.
In situations where the victimized partner has a supportive family network, as well as access to other resources, it is easier to leave the relationship. For isolated students who depend heavily on their partner, however, leaving an aggressive relationship can be difficult, if not impossible.
No one has the right to interfere in the matters of a couple. They should be allowed to resolve problems on their own, unless one or both of them asks for help.
As a part of the Job Corps community, everyone has a responsibly to reach out to those in need. This includes students who are being mistreated, even if they are not asking for help. Offering to help a student, or simply stating that you are concerned about a student, are ways of giving support and validation to a student who likely feels alone and powerless in her or his situation.
If you are aware that a student is engaged in an aggressive relationship, it is appropriate to let the student know that help is available and that the violence that they are enduring is not okay. Offering assistance to a student who is mistreated is not the same as interfering in the couple's relationship. It is likely that the student who is being victimized wants help but does not know how to get it or who to ask. The student may feel unsafe asking for help. They may also be ashamed that they are in a situation that includes relationship aggression.
Women and men who are involved in relationship aggression abuse their children. People who are violent or abused in one relationship respond by being abusive parents.
As was mentioned previously, students who are abused in their homes as children, often find themselves in abusive intimate relationships as adults. This pattern of life-long abusive relationships tends to repeat itself over generations, as children learn to abuse the next generation by watching their parents. Relationship aggression, when witnessed by children, is particularly powerful, as children watching this behavior are "taught" that this is an appropriate way in which to resolve conflict.
However, this does not mean that all people who were abused as children will become parents who abuse their children. An awareness of this issue, paired with a strong commitment to not act in aggressive or violent ways towards loved ones, especially children, can help to break this cycle of violence. This may require considerable resources for the person who seeks to stop this cycle, including mental health interventions and a community of non-abusing, supportive friends and family.
Some women end up in abusive or aggressive relationships because they seek out violent men who they know will abuse them.
We know that people who are abused as children often find themselves in adult relationships in which they are similarly victimized. However, no one deliberately chooses to be involved in relationship aggression. Instead, it appears that the familiarly of the abuse dynamic feels "normal" to victims of abuse who feel powerless to choose a different type of relationship.
Because it feels familiar to many students who have experienced violent and aggressive relationships in the past, these students may find themselves repeatedly choosing partners or relationships with these same features and dynamics. Other students may feel that they "deserve" to be abused or expect abuse. When abuse or aggression begins in their relationships, they may feel powerless to end the relationship or stop the violence. In doing this, these students may appear to be "choosing" or "seeking" these types of relationships.
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